Here’s why I don’t think I speak any of the love languages.

By Keara Steele - October 14, 2019

Receiving Gifts

I don’t know a person who wouldn’t love to receive a gift or two every now and then. I’m all for anything that I don’t have to spend my own money on. Just being honest. I adore when a significant other would shower me with nice things. Gifts are always a good idea if you want to get on my good side, but that’s all it’ll get you. I can’t love someone just because of the things they get me. However, I will use them. Shamelessly. If you want to base a relationship off what you can give me then so will I. But a relationship based on benefits has no room for love. 

Quality Time

We can Netflix and chill all day. We can ride bikes if you want. Let’s have a picnic or two. We can go to the movies. I love fine dining and wine tasting. I’m in desperate need for a “baecation” if you’re interested. I love cute dates or super chill hangout sessions, but I also love to be alone. I can honestly say that I need more alone time than most. I can spend ample amounts of time with a person of interest, but it may never amount to feelings of love. Honestly, I’m more likely to become annoyed with said person for invading on time that I could have spent alone. Sounds antisocial and introverted, right? I’m aware.

Words of Affirmation

Tell me how pretty I am. Tell me how smart I am. Tell me how much you love my writing. Tell me that I’m perfect to you in every way. Tell me that I’ll be successful one day. Feed me all the positive affirmations that you can think of. Do it. I dare you. It feels good knowing someone’s there to tell you all the good things you need to hear from time to time. Especially, when you’re having a rough time and it seems like everyone is there to keep you down. I must be a bit weird though, because sometimes positive affirmations annoy me. Look at it from my point of view for a second. Imagine needing criticism; needing to know what you’re lacking but being met with, “You’re perfect in every way, you couldn’t get any better.” It’s frustrating because clearly you know that there are areas that you need to improve and you’re reaching out for guidance but because someone’s so infatuated with you, they sensor out the constructive criticism and affirm everything you did instead. I can’t love someone who won’t give me the good, the bad, and the ugly at all times. 
actual words of affirmation

Acts of Service

Please don’t get a tattoo of my name on you. Please don’t put pictures of me all over your room. No, I don’t want a necklace with your initials on it. As cute as it may seem, please don’t give me a promise ring. I don’t need these kinds of things for you to prove your love to me. These things won’t make me love you. Once again, I’m probably alone on this one, but I get creeped out by acts of service such as these. It comes off as more of a control mechanism to me. Giving me a necklace with your initials feels like putting a dog collar on saying I belong to you. I’m not a pet. I am not to be owned. So, no. Acts of service do not warrant a feeling of love from me.

Physical Touch

Kissing is just kissing. Holding hands is just holding hands. Although many of us don’t want to believe it, sex can be just sex. People are not required to love you just because you engaged in any kind of physical activity with them. I stand firm on that statement. I am entirely capable of distinguishing the difference between love and physicality. I need more than just a touch to make me desire love from someone and want to give love to someone.

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  1. I was quite taken aback at how much I identify with your lifestyle and relationship feelings and philosophy. You are brilliant in addition to being stunningly beautiful. I love your profile photo.
    I agree completely with what you've written you seem to have it very much together - much more so than I.
    P.S.: I also love your Tweets on Twitter!
    Do you by any chance have a YouTube channel?

    my blog
    my YouTube
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